2009 Through My Eyes

• The loss of my uncle and gallbladder

• The start of Ferrara Turf, Inc. and the loss of our savings account

• We insured out life and Sophia’s future

• Sophia’s UTI confirmed that I was a hospital snob

• Welcoming a wonderful class of students

• Saying good-bye to student who changed me for the better

• Learning that I am a good teacher but I am an even better advocate

• Special Olympics

• Watched my little sister become a mother

• Became an aunt to an amazing little boy



• Made new friends, found old friends, and felt the loss of the distance I allowed to happen with close friends

• Anticipated being a mom again and again only to have it crushed again and again

• Began to understand what it means to, “put your life in God’s hands”

• Realized that I am firm on a conviction that it will be tested. “Never say Never”

• Said good-bye to Sophia’s restricted diet and hello to M&M’s

• Receiving a “letter of hope” helping us realize that family is what you make it.

• Realizing that I would never trade what I have with Mike and Sophia for more children or anything else in the world



• Many trips to a fertility clinic, OB appointments, Jenny Craig, allergists, dermatologists, pediatricians, Gastroenterologists, and hospitals
• Finally getting what mom has always said, “Enjoy what you have”

• Saying adoption and realizing that may be our next step

• Being overwhelmed with the internal conflicts of adoption, fertility drugs and idea of Sophia being an only child

• Watched proudly as my daughter danced for the first time...and cried






• Continued to let Sophia sleep in my bed when she wanted

• Said good-bye to a truck filled with memories; moving to mom’s house, our new house, leaving our wedding, engagement, our resting place at the beach, our private place to fight and love.






• Being disappointed in myself for being angry about the new babies that are going to be born in 2010….all within 10 days of when I should have been a mother.

• Finding gray hairS on my head

• Came to terms that I will never get the haircut I want so enjoy what is given

• Felt the strain of loss, fear, confusion, sadness and distance on my marriage but only for it to bring us a deeper love and understanding in the end

• Spent the first Christmas in 32 years away from my mom and sisters

• Didn’t feel sad on my Dad’s birthday this year…I think I found peace.

• The ear infection from hell

• Halloween was the best holiday of 2009!

• Sophia understood Christmas, sprinkled reindeer food, sang carols, made Christmas cookies for Santa, wore Christmas PJ made by Nana and decorated a gingerbread house all for the first time





• Made new holiday traditions

• Saying for 2009: "Sometimes in life, we are dealt with circumstances that we cannot control. It is how we react to that circumstance that classifies us as strong or weak individuals."~Adam Freeman

• Loved being a mom and a wife more this year with the love getting stronger with each turn of the calendar

• Watched as all the fears I had about Obama came true

• For Gay Marriage, Nuclear Weapons, and abortion and against Universal Healthcare,the CDC vaccine schedule and handouts for the poor and lazy.

• Followed a blog of a preemie that passed away this year. Cried as if I had held her and spent hours with her.

• Thanked God, yelled at God, questioned God, and began to understand God a little more

• 8,000 + e-mails in my inbox

• Proud of the life that Mike and I have built and look forward to watching it evolve






• Woke at 11:58pm to welcome the New Year….2010 will be a life changing year!