Waking up!

I began my day like any other – following the same rituals to barely get myself to work presentably and on time. I have recently learned to buy my coffee at work rather than before to offer my body a few more minutes of “rest”. Still half sleeping, eyes squinting I stand in line at Coffee Central. My heart starts racing to notice that “Blueberry Muffin” is the coffee of the day (my favorite). But standing in the long line with the rest of medical personnel I begin to wonder how our actions resemble a herd of animals – collectively walking in big groups to a certain destination. As I patiently wait in a line that seems endless (like is does every morning) I begin to see the light. I have entered the last straight away of the pre-divided lines they set up like in amusement parks. I now can see the counter with a short sign hanging above that reads COFFEE EXPRESS LINE. For those of you unaware of the coffee express line in consists of only those who order coffee and nothing else, no food orders are taken. It collects only those who need coffee to wake up to eat their breakfast. I see a short older woman standing behind the counter speaking and moving as if she were on pause. I stand there almost in complete panic wondering if my cup of blueberry muffin caffeine will never be given to me unless some presses the play button. I quickly turn my head around looking for a square box with an arrow pointing to the right to symbolize “play”. I almost start loudly asking “Does anyone know where the play button is?” I begin sweating. I luckily came to realize that my mind is not fully functioning until my caffeine fix has been activated and resume my standing position in line, mouth closed. However, still wondering where the button could be if needed.

Being more aware of my surroundings due to the prior panic attack I decided to watch the people in line that had a better place than me. I almost become jealous of them. I began to realize that everyone had the same reaction when they received their coffee. They speak their custom order of their morning brew and wait. They lean over the counter to monitor every action that is taken. The know and don't care how stupid they may look. The cup is set on the counter, the customer pays. With a cup in one hand and wearing a grin as if they were on antidepressants, they turn to the right and lift the cup as if to say “too bad you weren't me”. Damn them I thought silently. My mind was now in a dark place. How dare they patronize me. I am only human.

I wait. I am getting close enough so i can start to hear what people order. I can see steam rising from the coffee's being served. I can smell that aroma that always puts a smile on my face. I can see the excitement of the people around me as we keep taking 2 steps forward when the person in front of us has been served. I lean in to hear an order. “Large frozen cappuccino!” Her words come out as if she was on cruise control. Her drink arrived. My first thought was “Those are so good, but a lot of calories”. She asked for chocolate syrup to be added. It actually sounded more like a desperate request. The woman adds about 4 tablespoons of the liquid chocolate. It forms ribbons in and around her drink and settles to the bottom. Again I am only stuck wondering how many calories this woman is going to consume in one morning beverage. She was carrying a few extra pounds in baggage so I began to think, maybe she doesn't care. Maybe oral satisfaction is what makes her life worth living. I ponder for a moment. I watch as her drink is handed back to her. She looks euphoric. The women stops in the middle of handing her precious drink back to the customer when she asks “Would you also like some whipped cream on top?” Her voice was soft, yet loud enough for the few people who were paying attention to hear what was holding up the line. The customers face changed. “What happened” I thought. She was in pure ecstasy to being extremely offended in a matter of 2.6 seconds. Did I mishear what had said? My ears perk up to listen. My eyes widen. My mouth even starts salivating. The woman steps back in disgust. Hand in the air as if she was saying “No you didn't”. She did however say “OH HECK NO! Do you know how many calories are in whipped cream?” The cashier had no response verbally or visually. She handed the cappuccino to the woman and takes her money to pay. The woman takes her drink and storms off. She was so offended she forgot to smile and gloat. I start to giggle, “how dare she offer her whipped cream” I thought.

Only 2 more people to go. I begin to smell the toasting of a plain bagel and hear someone confirm their order “Yes please – with extra cream cheese”. You can always tell which line you belong in on how polite you are before your morning fix. The words please and thank you do not exist in my dictionary until after my first cup o'joe. A bagel with cream cheese – no, extra cream cheese. How delicious! No I kept telling myself repeatedly. You are almost there. If you step out now, you will have to wait in the other line to be served that soft, fresh toasted bagel with cream cheese busting out of the sides. I automatically step forward in the empty space in front of me without hesitation. I keep thinking about the bagel. I see from afar the display case of cakes, cookies, muffins and scones. The light gleaming off them all as if they were made of gold.

“Next!” I am taken out of my trance by a familiar voice. I do not know this woman, but I talk with her everyday I work. I wonder what her name is. “Large blueberry muffin coffee with just cream...please”. Yes! I remembered to use the word please. I lean over the counter and watch. That's right, just cream. I see the steam, I smell the fresh blueberries used in making this coffee. I can smell the batter cooking in the hot stove. I see the short older woman walking back to me. She puts the lid on and waits. I hand her my money, pick up my coffee. I look at the line of desperate people, raise my cup and smile. Today is going to be a great day!